Do you live each day with a constant nervousness, a sense of unease, a self-conscious awareness that forces you into obsessive introspection and excessive reflection? If this sounds like you, then you’re probably suffering from anxiety.
Anxiety can be a crushing feeling. If you’re dealing with anxiety though, don’t worry, because you’re not alone. Millions of people live with the same relentless angst and nervousness that you experience every day.
You may never even know if someone has anxiety because they naturally seek out social situation to compensate and minimize their psychological troubles. Ironically enough, the people who appear to be the most social and confident, can at the time be the people struggling with mind-numbing anxieties, or insecurities.
Anxiety is characterized as excessive nervousness and irrational worries. The feeling, as you may know, is really not easy to deal with on a regular basis.
Anxious minds often surround themselves with other people as a way to relieve anxiety. These social interactions create valuable moments of psychological release. However, when immersed in social situations an anxious mind may still find it difficult to not overthink things. Continue reading →
“People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.”
– Elizabeth Gilbert
I remember when I was in my 20′s and still held onto the misconceived romantic notion of a “soul mate.”
You know the one: one day you will meet the man or woman of your dreams and they will fix all of your broken pieces, thereby making you complete. That concept is wildly inaccurate, in regards to what an actual soul mate really is- a mirror.
When we believe there is another person who can make us whole, we are ineffectually calling ourselves “incomplete,” and we are anything but that. We have the power within ourselves to achieve that oneness; we really mustn’t try to find the answers to our problems in another.
By thinking we are only halves meant to become whole, we are in fact searching for others who see themselves as halves as well. But what does this accomplish? If you feel like a shattered spirit, then you probably attract the same .
For some, reading people accurately is a gift they already possess. For others, it is something that needs a fair amount of fine-tuning. Several factors contribute to our perception of others, and knowing the cause for our distorted readings, will undoubtedly assist in making them more precise in the future.
Emotional intelligence is something which we grew up learning to strengthen, or to stunt. If you were told not to cry as a child, or taught to negate your own emotions with responses like “I’m fine,” you are prone to be less receptive to others’ emotional state than someone who grew up discussing their feelings.
David Caruso, PhD, a well-known psychologist, Assistant to the Dean at Yale University, and co-author of the Mayer, Salovey, Caruso Emotional Intelligence Test, says being taught to hide the very thing which makes us human can have disastrous effects later-on in our adult life.
The things we consider day-to-day activities can also affect our ability to accurately read others. A recent study published in Computers in Human Behavior explains what happens when we remove screen-based media and communication devices from our lives and replace them with physical, and personal connections instead: Continue reading →
As a Virgo, I can tell you that the majority of the astrological assumptions made about us are bang-on. I’m normally not one to jump on the bandwagon of descriptive personality traits, but I’ve caught myself nodding my head in agreement over the commonly mentioned characteristics- controlling, critical, obsessive, and a bit overly-honest. These traits make relationships with us very interesting, and knowing how to handle these traits will undoubtedly improve the bond between you and your Virgo partner.
1. Unpradictability is a No-Go
Virgos prefer their life to have some semblance of order and routine. While we can have moments of spontaneity, most of the time we want to know there is a next step, what it is, and how to get there.
If you offer to take your Virgo partner or friend out for dinner and they decline, it isn’t because they don’t love you or don’t want to go, but rather they have other things planned ahead already.
Keep in mind, changing plans isn’t easy for a Virgo because of how much they schedule for themselves on a daily basis. Loving a Virgo means you need to allow them to find stability where they can, and as an Earth sign, stability is very important.
2. Perfectionism vs. Improvement
A common word found in descriptions of Virgos is “perfectionist.” I can’t whole-heartedly agree with that, and would say we are more “improvement-ists.”
It might come across like your Virgo partner is nit-picking, or trying to make things perfect, but what they are really doing is finding ways to improve their life, and yours. Virgos find joy in being useful, and will show their love by helping you in many different ways (even ways you may not realize).
This is a visualization from the Peruvian shamanic tradition brought to you by Trevor Lewis, an empath healer and author. This exercise ensures you’re using energies wisely. To start, pick any area of your life where you want to change the energy you’re investing.
This can be a person or a concept, for example a relationship, friendship, money, or job. You can do this visualization with all areas of your life. Checking the cords within your life ensures that you have the right balance of energy with every person and field.
Next, when you have a person or concept in mind, imagine two cords connecting you to the target: 1. One for energy going from you to them or the concept. 2. One for energy coming from them or the concept to you.
Now, in your minds eye look at the two cords and ask:
1. Do they contain light or dark energy? If there is a dark energy present, imagine the light energy dissipating the dark until there’s only light energy.
2. Is it an equal exchange of light energy? If not, are you putting out more light than you are receiving back or vice versa? Now, visualize an equal amount of light energy exchanging between the cords.
3. Do you need to increase or decrease the thickness of the cords?
When you want an increase of flow, resulting in a stronger connection for a significant relationship, visualize more light energy flowing through the cords. See the cords begin to strengthen and become more vibrant. Continue reading →
What does being mindful mean? You may have heard of mindfulness meditation but what does it mean to BE mindful? Mindfulness is defined as the quality or state of being conscious or aware of something. Being mindful means to have that awareness of everything around you. According to Jon Kabat-Zinn, “mindfulness means paying attention in a particular way; on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmentally.”
Mindfulness practitioners learn how to pay attention on purpose by practicing specially developed mindfulness meditation practices & mindful movements. Being mindful is an intentional way of being that you can cultivate on a daily basis. Being mindful means to be conscious and aware of all the things around you and how you affect them.
For instance, I live in a house that has a basement apartment below. I try to be conscious of the noise that I make and since I stay up very late at night doing things like writing articles I try my best to not disturb people sleeping in close proximity to my activities. I am careful not to wear shoes in my house and to walk lightly on my feet.
As a young man, I was taught by rainbow family elders to tread lightly in the woods. Not only does this mean to physically walk lightly, meaning on the front of your feet and not on your heels, but also to be aware of WHERE you step, HOW you step ,and even WHEN you step. Basically, this just means to be aware of how you affect your surroundings.
Another way to practice being mindful is with your voice. Not only can one take care in what they say but HOW they say it. The volume of one’s voice can also be important.
Do you use an inside voice when you’re outside? You may not get heard or may get asked to constantly repeat yourself. Do you use an outside voice when you’re inside? You may be so loud that you become annoying without even knowing it.
Being aware of your surroundings and the vibration you are putting forth in those surroundings is very important when being mindful.
There are many ways to become more mindful and mindfulness meditation is one of those ways. There are many mindfulness meditation resources on the web. Here are some tips on being more mindful…
Pay attention to your breathing. When all else fails always return to this tip.
Try to notice everything that you are doing when you’re doing something specific. For instance, if you are taking a shower notice the sound of the water, the temperature of the water, the smell of the soap and any other thing that you can sense. If you are eating notice the texture and the color of the food, its taste, its smell and texture.
Focus on the things that distract you. Pay attention to where you space out, for example, being on the computer, driving, doing household chores. Focus on bringing more awareness to those moments of distraction.
Be aware of people around you. Notice their eyes, their clothes. Take advantage of every moment and compliment someone or express affection.