Disagreements are bound to happen in relationships. Don’t get mad at yourself or the people around you, just re-examine the way you both communicate. You don’t want to fight what makes you think they do? There is so much emotional and social content inherent in relationships, adding your frustrations and anger to it won’t make for a fast or meaningful recovery. Clear and honest communication is the only true cure to drama.
Bring Problems Up Immediately
There is no perfect time to tell someone something is wrong. It will take away from a good mood and add more reasons for a bad mood. Have faith in those around you, don’t under estimate them. That having been said you will want to use your intuition, empathy and common sense to feel out whether or not the person will be receptive to what you are saying. If they are not then what are saying will be misconstrued. Don’t wait for the fabled perfect time, wait till they can hear what you are saying.
Be the Real You
Its very easy to act differently around various people. Everyone has their own expectations of others and needs. We sometimes unknowingly project these needs onto others. Don’t give into this influence! Be true to yourself, your feelings and your needs. Act like you want to act while still respecting those around you. If you are being yourself that truthful reality will open the door for others to be the same. If everyone is being true to themselves and respectful then communication will be a breeze.
Treat People the Way THEY Would Like To Be Treated
Individuals desire different things out of their life and look for various elements in the people they surround themselves with. Your personal preferences does not supercede anyone else’s no matter what may you may think or feel. If you ignore how people want to be treated you will never be able to consistently connect with them. You will go to show them you secret brand of respect and they will not receive it as that. They will balk at the gift and the relationship will sour. Most people will only wait around in a bad situation for so long.
Remember We Are All One
To raise your voice to your coworker is the same as yelling at your sister. To talk badly about your neighbor is the same as berating your mother. Confused? We are all one family! That individual you are interacting with is someone’s daughter, friend, father or more.
Listen!
I know this one is obvious…So just do it and do it better. When someone is talking to you put down what your are doing physically and mentally. Address what the person is saying and share your insight with them. Every conversation is a dialogue, so don’t just stare at the person. They came to you for a reason take the time to be there for them. If you are unable to be there emotionally or mentally explain your circumstances to them. Communicate what you can and can’t do.
Observe The Person
No one likes the guy walking around blindly asking if everything is alright. When people are being true to themselves they send strong language both verbally and non verbally. Asking someone, ‘is everything ok?’ when their arms crossed and a scowl on their face is paramount to blatantly ignoring everything they say. Pay attention to the non verbal cues.
Don’t Ignore The Problem Or Person
This is literally the worst passive solution you can execute to solve anything. Hoping that it will ‘blow over’ or they will just leave is awful. Even if it were to ‘blow over’ that issue will remain dormant in the person’s subconscious, changing how they act towards you. If the person does leave the situation never to return now they have a chip on their shoulder. Don’t make others deal with your problems. Clean up behind yourself as well as you can.
Breathe
Tensions may get high and few think clearly when emotional. Breathe and acknowledge what is going on. Smile inwardly and release your attachments. If you have to go for a walk or try and table the conversation.
Admit When You Are Wrong
This is hard to do for one of two reasons. You are either too proud and simply never wrong or you were really trying to make that instance work and it blew up. Either way ego is murdering your relationship. both sound like they are different sides of the spectrum but they are side by side in hubris. Communicate what your intention was and explain that you didn’t want to hurt anyone.