Many of us consider ourselves both an introvert and extrovert depending on our surroundings. Which one is more dominant for you? And which one do you find yourself struggling with?
The classic trait of being an introvert isn’t necessarily being shy, but not getting as much energy from interacting with those around you. When you get down to it, studies actually show that has to do with our brains. Introverted people have less dopamine released when they interact with people.
“A 2012 study completed by Randy Buckner of Harvard University discovered that introverts tended to have larger, thicker gray matter in their prefrontal cortex — a region of the brain that is linked to abstract thought and decision-making — while extroverts had less gray matter.”
You Get Less Energy From People
Many of us have combinations of introverted and extroverted traits within us. One of the most common traits of an introvert is getting less energy from interacting with people. To certain degree, we all have this.
Some people can go to a party and talk to almost anyone, enjoying light conversation with no specific outcome.
Many introverts enjoy deep, more involved conversations that take more energy, so they don’t start them in the first place.
To have simple and shallow conversations can take way more energy than it should. It takes energy to seem interested when you’re not and to keep a level of poise when you’re not completely comfortable with the person you’re talking to.
You Want To Be Around People… But You Also Don’t
When we’re surrounded by people who don’t understand us or our point of view, interacting with them can be incredibly exhausting.
If you have an idea you want to share but you know you won’t be understood, that takes more energy than you might realize.
Also, because of this modern age riddled with technology, many of us enjoy the company of people but still feel compelled to be on our phones on the computer.
Many of us have experienced a desire to be around people, but still get a certain comfort on the Internet that humans can’t always provide.
This might be because there is no verbal interaction or requirements, and you’re constantly looking at things that entertain you.
You Enjoy Attention, But Not Too Much
If you’re in a setting like a bar or a party, and you’re enjoying the attention you’re getting, this can be a great source of energy for you.
The moment it shifts and starts getting awkward or uncomfortable, then everything changes. It can be fun to get attention in a group of friends where you know everyone and feel like you aren’t being judged.
For many of us, the feeling of being judged is one of the scariest.
There’s a balance between being the one speaking and having all the energy drawn to you, and then giving it back.
When you’re in a situation like that, it’s important to pass the energy around through verbal or physical communication so you don’t feel burdened or overwhelmed.
You Want To Share Ideas, But Don’t Want to Be Judged
The concept of an introvert or extrovert is greatly dictated by our environment. If you know you’re around people who don’t fundamentally understand the same ideas as you, wanting to share your thoughts but being too scared of getting judged takes a lot of energy out of you.
For many introverts, they want to create a connection and understanding but are sometimes too scared to make that first initiation. Humans are programmed to be afraid of judgment because we don’t want to be accused of anything negative.
You know you’re interacting with someone who is an introvert, make the initiation to talk about a topic that you know they enjoy. This will give them an immense amount of energy because they didn’t need to start the conversation, and it shows that you’re interested in it as well.
You Break Out of Your Shell When You Feel Safe
This really is basic human nature. When we are in a safe space, we feel free to be ourselves and say whatever comes to our mind.
When we are in stressful or chaotic environments, we are usually in a more survival based mindset.
If you feel like you are a shy introvert who wants to break out of their shell, first make sure you’re not surrounded by people that bring you stress in your life.
Many people will consider themselves depressed, crazy or upset because they think something is wrong with them, when really it is their environment that is not in support of them.
Make sure you are surrounded by are loving people, and breaking out of your shell will come naturally to you.