Music Quest -sing the blues

fret
verb: to feel or express worry, discontent
noun: A sequence of bars or ridges on the fingerboard of some stringed musical instruments (such as guitar), used for fixing the positions of the fingers to produce the desired notes

 

I have this memory of being a young girl playing alone in my bedroom.  But I wasn’t playing with dolls, I was playing pretend, and not that I was a ballerina, but that I was locked in my room and pounding on the door desperately trying to escape.  I sat by the door with tears in my eyes, though I could get up and walk out any time I wanted.  There was no lock on my door as a child, so I drew one in with magic marker. The imaginary lock remained there until puberty when I upgraded to an actual locked door.  I remembered this childhood game only recently as I’ve been contemplating my reasons for being an artist.  Whenever I feel my efforts are in vain I take a step back and really ask myself if I am on this journey because I am compelled to from within – or if it is a game for me, a goal I set in my mind that I’m too stubborn to let go of until I reach it. The question keeps coming up, why art, why make it? Does it really help anyone but myself?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q3NyesCaE2I&feature=g-upl&context=G223d304AUAAAAAAAAAA

The song I am releasing today is called, “Sweetie, Don’t,” and it was written a few years ago when I was experiencing some heart ache with my boyfriend.   Being involved in the Spirit Science community where we are advocates of love and positivity, I had to contemplate whether or not this track would be received well.  But I realized that for me to be happy, I have to live according to my values, and I value sadness and the beauty that comes from it, I’m a blues singer.

In the book, “The Family” by John Bradshaw, he explains shame as a “soul murderer.”  He says experiencing guilt is like saying, “I did something bad,” whereas feeling shameful is like saying, “I am  bad.”   As we research spirituality and read about the law of attraction and philosophy that says ego creates emotions like fear, frusturation, jealousy, etc…it is easy for us to feel shameful when we encounter these feelings.  And I’m sure the ego does create these “negative” emotions, but so much great work has come out of these feelings, and I can’t help but think some of us, if not all, are supposed to experience them.  What would our art be like if we didn’t?

My sister, Rachel Roze, http://rachelroze.com/ , visited recently, she is an artist and took me to see the  ”In Wonderland: The Surrealist Adventures of Women Artists in Mexico and the United States” exhibit at LACMA featuring the work of Frida Kahlo. There were many great works there, but it was clear that Frida Kahlo’s painting, “The Two Fridas” was most stunning and powerful.  My sister and I felt Frida’s pain reverberating from the canvas.  To stand in front of that painting was an experience I will cherish.  I do not know anyone who has suffered like she had, and I felt grateful for her for her painting, so I may get only a sense of a fraction of the pain she felt.  Do others feel the same way about art? Why do we need art?

The reason I ask myself time and time again whether or not my efforts are for ego or for enlightenment, is because I feel there are so many artists now – so much art – do we really need more?   Recently I was interviewed for a documentary about music where I admitted that I have little knowledge about popular music.  Contrary to what my acting teacher used to tell me, I don’t think it’s necessary to be “obsessed” with the creative field you’re in.  I do wish to be more knowledgeable, but I want that to happen naturally.  I rarely have music playing in the background – it penetrates my attention – and I don’t want to lessen my sensitivity to it.  But there is so much music, so much art, so many poems and prose and film and comedy, and sometimes I feel overwhelmed.  Is there really something that I can say that hasn’t been said before?

But that’s why it is important for us to be truly honest.  Our perceptions are really the only things about us that are truly unique.  Having said all this, I need to touch upon a concern of mine – that there is a terrible misconception among aspiring artists and the fetishism of misery.  I admitted to doing it myself as a child so I feel alright about advising against it.  We see movies about artists such as Johnny Cash, Ray Charles, Billie Holiday, Marilyn Monroe, Jimi Hendrix, Jim Morrison, all having similar themes like drug addiction, alcoholism, and relationship abuse.  In some of our subconsciousness we may think that to be great artists we have to have these issues and actually make them ourselves.  This is cause for dishonest art and delusional artists.  We cannot live life without pain – but real pain comes when we strive to live content lives and life gets in the way.  And when those true moments of sorrow and hopelessness, heartbreak and humiliation arise, it gives us opportunity to expand our emotional range, turn those feelings into art, morphing them into something positive and getting back what we initially wanted.  That is the right to sing the blues.  That is why we make art.  So sing.

 

To download, “Sweetie, Don’t” by ShePatch, the original recording, and a special live recording, visit

 http://soundcloud.com/shepatch

Love and Gratitude,

Vanessa Cuccia

“ShePatch”

shepatch.spiritscience@gmail.com

 

 

Comments

  1. I’m a blues guitarist myself. When I write a song whether my inspiration for writing it is either pain, love, or anything in between, I find that although suffering may dictate the content of the song, it’s the love of the music that allows me to create to my fullest capacity. Hearing your song I think you definitely create out of love for your music. It really shows through the quality of your work :)

  2. I can understand the desire to make art that is inspired, flowing from a place of pure intention. The fact that you ask such questions says something about your heart. And while this medium (Internet) may have inundated us with so much art, your art is wonderful because you share it from your perspective, with your voice, and in your style. Thanks for sharing your art and your experiences with the community Vanessa.

    Scott

  3. Thank you Vanessa, I got some insight into myself from your words :) Also, isn’t the title “SweetieBounce?” ahah :P

    <3
    Patch

    1. Thank you! LOL, no one has caught onto that so far! Hey, isn’t your name Spirit Patch now? ;-) hehe

  4. We are having a human experience, so I think the point of art coming from that is for us to be able to express, share and feel fully all the feelings the human experience brings – “good” or “bad” – so we can feel them, learn and move on.Perhaps it is part of the knowing the darkness so we can know the light. How often is it that if we let a feeling out it dissapears and we forget it quickly, but if we hide it it will fester and create havok? We should be proud to let out even our “shameful” feelings.It does indeed turn to beauty when your song touches another persson and creates happiness in them just because they know you felt the same thing. It reminds us we are one, and that is perhaps helping us realise “who we truly are”? I write that as a question as I am melerly on a quest of my own too :-)

  5. Thinking about the Id and enlightenment… why should we strive so hard to attain spirituality here on earth, when our spiritual selves intended us to experience the Id here anyways? Perhaps the negative connotations we associate with the Id so often are just negative connotations, and as you said, there is much beauty about it.

    Anyways, I love your song!
    Beautiful stuff there